'Doors Without Roses'
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 Doors Without Roses
Journeys through Abuse . . .




Spread the word about the 'Silent Solution' below - Dialling 999 is not enough if it isn't safe to speak - Press 55 when given the option

Northumbria Police


Did you know coercive control is now an imprisonable offence? But what is it?

Overt jealousy, social isolation, controlling money, surveillance via phone - they're all examples of what can be going on beneath the surface of an abusive relationship. All are very hard to recognise too. Just because the abuser never hits you doesn't mean you're not a victim. To outsiders things can seem fine but beneath the surface things can be very different.

If, during the festivities, you suspect someone you know is suffering emotional or physical domestic abuse, please call - 0800 066 5555

25th November

International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women

  • Violence against women is a human rights violation
  • Violence against women is a consequence of discrimination against women, in law and also in practice, and of persisting inequalities between men and women
  • Violence against women impacts on, and impedes, progress in many areas, including poverty eradication, combating HIV/AIDS, and peace and security
  • Violence against women and girls is not inevitable. Prevention is possible and essential
  • Violence against women continues to be a global pandemic

September 2015

Women in the World

On Friday morning, Lady Gaga released a video for her new song “Til It Happens To You," which shows harrowing scenes of sex assault on a college campus and depicts three survivors.

Survivors’ song

Lady Gaga’s new video raises awareness about campus sexual assault


Time & time again, people ask “Why doesn’t she just leave?”. Learn the barriers to fleeing an abusive partner. Remember: if you’re worried about a friend or family member, you can make a difference. Visit: http://www.1in4women.com/

Women in the World

“Women are dying every day as a result of domestic violence, and our state and federal laws are insufficient in the face of this crisis,” VPC legislative director Kristen Rand said in a statement.

Men who kill

The “boyfriend loophole” in U.S. gun laws is costing women’s lives

New data shows that more than 1,600 American women were murdered by men in 2013 – and the majority were intimate partners killed by guns

Domestic violence refuges are in danger. A huge funding crisis means they are struggling to stay open - and women fleeing abuse are being turned away.

Please email your MP candidates to make sure the new Government acts!

30th April 2015

Refuge responds to IPCC report into the murder of Hollie Gazzard in Gloucester: “Yet again, poor police training and understanding of domestic violence has hindered their ability to respond to a young woman in urgent need of help."

Sandra Horley CBE, chief executive of national domestic violence charity Refuge, says:

“The death of Hollie Gazzard is deeply tragic. My thoughts go out to her family at this incredibly difficult time.


12th March 2015

Unequal, trapped and controlled: women’s experiences of financial abuse and the potential implications for Universal Credit. A new report by Women's Aid . . .

Banks and benefit system have roles to play in stopping financial abuse. Today Women’s Aid and TUC have published new research into women’s experiences of financial abuse. It finds that financial abuse includes control over money, exploitation of the survivor’s assets and sabotage of survivor’s efforts to work, study or interact with others; and that many women had little or no access to money even in a joint account. It recommends that banks could flag accounts where abuse is known and train their staff in coercive control and financial abuse and that Universal Credit programme should be reviewed to minimise the opportunities for financial abuse of
women and children.



I hope you’ll join me on Sunday 8th of March at 1PM NYC/5PM London-time for a conversation about He For She and Gender Equality, live on Facebook. If you’re in ...London and would like to be there in person, tell me how you are making a personal impact to advance gender equality. Please submit your story, here: http://goo.gl/forms/dRzVjsdNSR, by 12PM London-time on Wednesday 4th of March and you could be selected to attend this special event as an audience member! Em x

“Never stop believing in your own worth” says survivor Katarina Nielsen ‪#‎SurviveAndThrive‬ Support Kat's incredible fundraiser here: http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/…/showFundraiserProfilePage…

8th & 9th March 2015

Safe World for Women is delighted to be a Tweetathon partner for the two day online event organised by SAYFTY for International Women's Day!


January 2015


Domestic Violence Law Reform Campaign achieves criminalisation of coercive control

Polly Neate, Chief Executive of Women’s Aid said:

“We welcome the Home Secretary’s announcement that the Government will criminalise the patterns of coercive, controlling, and psychologically abusive behaviour which lie at the heart of domestic violence. We hope the new law will signal that a culture change is needed in responding to the abuse so many women experience. We look forward to working together with the Home Office to ensure the new law is as effective as it can be, and that the police and criminal justice system are able to receive specialist-led domestic violence training so that they are able to fully utilise the new legislation"

Go to:
Media Centre on the left index - then Press Releases
to see more . . .

January 27th 2015

Clare's Law: 1,300 domestic abuse disclosures made

A scheme allowing people to find out if their partner has a history of domestic violence has been used more than 1,300 times in less than a year.

Clare's Law - named after Clare Wood, who was murdered by her ex-boyfriend in 2009 - came into force across England and Wales in March 2014.

At least 1,335 disclosures have been made so far, police figures obtained by the Press Association show.


January 6th 2015

A common belief concerning domestic violence is that the crime consists only of physical abuse and threats of violence. But, in reality, some of the most degrading types of abuse are those that constrain the victim's behavior. It is not uncommon for perpetrators to seek control of their victims through other ways beside violence that are equally hurtful... See More:


December 10th 2014

Women's Aid Celebrates its
40th Birthday today


December 2014


On Tuesday, 25 November I attended the ‘Domestic Abuse Hurts Everyone’ conference as part of my day job.

The conference, held at Bannatynes spa and hotel in Hastings, was attended by school governors, doctor surgery managers, local councillors and senior police officers, among others. It was run by the East Sussex Safer Communities Partnership on White Ribbon day, a campaign which puts the onus on men and boys speaking out against violence towards women and girls...

Chief Supt Honnor opens DAHurts Event, Hastings
Guest Speaker - Peter James, Author
(See Link to his Facebook Page below)

25th November 2014

25th November 2014

Today is international day for the elimination of violence against women & girls. Please share to show your support!


25th November 2014

Refuge parcels

This Christmas, buy a Refuge parcel and support women and children escaping domestic violence


25th November 2014

Peter James Author

Gave a talk this morning on Domestic Abuse at an East Sussex County Council White Ribbon initiative to stop domestic violence against women - and children. Sad statistic is that the average woman is violently abused 35 times before she contacts the police. So many people live their lives terrified of their partner. . .

Visit His Facebook Page to see more :


29th October 2014

This morning Refuge CEO Sandra Horley gave oral evidence to the Joint Committee on Human Rights as part of its inquiry into violence against women and girls. Sandra's evidence was informed by the voices and needs of the 3,000 women and children we support on any given day. You can watch the oral evidence session here:


October 2014

Eastbourne police cadets support for White Ribbon anti-domestic abuse campaign:


October 2014

Diana Barran is not the boastful type but she does feel gratified to have made a measurable difference to the lives of domestic violence victims. She set up Caada (Co-ordinated Action Against Domestic Abuse) on her kitchen table a decade ago. As it marks its 10th anniversary, she talks of at least 64,000 high-risk adult cases and over 83,500 associated child cases that the work of the charity has helped and supported.


October 2014

Coercive Control


"When Abbie Horne met her husband, she was a confident professional, earning more than £70,000 a year, with a company sports car. Well-travelled and university-educated, the 38-year-old had her own house, a close circle of friends and a supportive family.

Her new husband, a police officer turned investor, persuaded her to quit her job to concentrate on building a family, and took over selling her house to buy a bigger one. By the time baby No 2 arrived, Horne seemed to have it all: a gorgeous £600,000 house, on acres of land in the east Midlands, with the family she had longed for, and a man she could rely on who was happy to make the financial decisions.

Instead, Horne was isolated from her family and friends and subjected to over a decade of emotional and financial abuse by a man who spun complex lies to ensure she remained financially dependent on him. He paid all the bills, did the food shopping, thus controlling what the family ate, and aside from £120-a-month child benefit, which she used to buy the children’s clothes, Horne had virtually no access to money."  . . .

September 2014

Women's Aid welcomes Home Office Campaign on Coercive Control


Women's Aid has welcomed the Home Office consultation in response to the Domestic Violence Law Reform Campaign's calls for the criminalisation of coercive control, but urges campaigners must wait for the consultation outcome before taking further action

20 YEARS, 30 YEARS, 40 YEARS, 50 YEARS, 100 YEARS,


September 2014

In her famous 1996 commencement address, writer Nora Ephron warned the new graduates of Wellesley college that they were entering a world that was hostile to women's achievements and begged them to "take it personally."

"Understand," she said, "every attack on Hillary Clinton for not knowing her place is an attack on you." We must all take such attacks personally, she argued: "Underneath almost all those attacks are the words: Get back, get back to where you once belonged."


On September 21 2014, actress and UN Goodwill Ambassador Emma Watson stood up at the UN Headquarters in New York City and delivered a powerful speech condemning the harm that gender discrimination causes to both men and women, and inviting men to become active participants in the global struggle for equality. The next day, anonymous individuals set up a website targeting Watson with sexual threats . . .

September 2014

19 #WhyIStayed Tweets - Everyone Should Read

August 23rd 2014

Show your Support and Fill in the Home Office Survey on Domestic Violence Now . . .

Behind Closed Doors . . .


Home Sweet Home Home Sweet Home Home Sweet Home Home Sweet Home Home Sweet Home

Before It's Too Late . . . . . Sussex Police
A domestic abuse video made by Sussex Police and narrated by 44 staff and officers as part of a campaign to encourage the early reporting of domestic abuse.


Violence victim wants new laws

A survivor of domestic violence has launched a campaign for a change in the law after she was threatened with jail when she refused to disclose her address to a judge


Lest We Forget . . .

This Collection has been published to continue making people aware that Domestic Violence and Sexual Abuse is truly Global and comes in many guises. More often than not making Vicarious Abuse and its lifelong effects on our innocent children a frightening reality.

And hopefully, it will help to demonstrate that more legislation is needed to make aid available to victims worldwide – those who are so often ignored or not taken seriously.

Domestic Violence (VAW) is serious and affects mothers, wives, daughters and children who are the cornerstones of our societies everywhere.

It is never acceptable, yet is still rife throughout the world and growing.



NCDV Video - How To Take Action NOW . . .

It is now available online at Amazon.co.uk (click on any thumbnail book cover or Amazon Link throughout this site). Also go to: Amazon.com, Amazon.de, Amazon.fr, Amazon.es, Amazon.it
It is also available now on: Smashwords which distributes to: Apple iBookstore, Sony, Kobo, B&N (Barnes & Noble - Nook Reader) , Stanza, Aldiko. Also, Palmdoc., Sony Readers, Adobe Digital Editions (Epub - similar to Kindle for your PC), or simply on your PC or Mac as Rich Text, PDF, or Plain Text
You have a choice when downloading from Smashwords - the best seem to be PDF, Adobe Digital Editions (Epub) & Kindle*
*The type is very large on some Readers - which breaks up the flow - so to allow the poems to look their best - make the font size smaller 
Sue Bodilly

"Remember the dignity of your womanhood.

Do not appeal, do not beg, do not grovel.

Take courage, join hands, stand beside us, fight with us."

 Christabel Pankhurst, Suffragette, 1880-1950, Britain

For More Information:
SouthernBelle Publishing